It's a potentially serious problem: now that tube tops are so long out of fashion that you can't even find them at the thrift shop, sub-proletariats are going to have a lot of trouble hooking up with promiscuous white trash women, and what with all the middle class kids dressing dumpster chic, it's really difficult to tell folks apart. Is this woman wearing second-hand clothing or did it cost hundreds of dollars to look she is?

It really is impossible to tell:

• Her outfit, surplus polyester and faux velvet, could have been assembled from "found objects," or it could be a designer label
• The brass and pewter accents could be from some wagon in a mall or from an upscale boutique.
• The hat could be a high-ticket accessory, or some bus diver might have left in her trailer.

And what with the funk that passes for perfume these days, you probably couldn't tell whether she'd been sleeping in her own urine or had splashed on CK "Be."

Be malodorous ...
Be fetid ...
.. just be!

At first glance, she really does resemble the kind of low-class trailer trash that would "do" any passer by for a pack of cigarettes - which is maybe the only way to tell: anyone so beguiled as to think this is high fashion is probably so beguiled by propaganda that she wouldn't smoke, either, but would trade her favors for a granola-yogurt bar instead.