I used to go to these parties with this gal from the building where I lived. It's not that we wanted to do with each other ... no, that's not quite true - like any male-female friendship, she wanted nothing to do with me, but I've have been on her like warts on a Dutchman if she'd given me half a chance ....

... but that's another story.

We went to these parties because, ironically enough, a person's chances of scoring are considerably better if they seem to be unavailable. This defies all logic, because if a person is any good at sex, they don't need government assistance to retain a partner - and if a person is married, hence no good at sex, there can't be any point in pursuing them. With that in mind, "wife-swapping" doesn't make any sense at all. But if abstract logic isn't enough, just have a look at these swinging couples.

Is anyone going to be happy at the end of the evening?

Let's face it - if you got too drunk at a party and ended up in Reno hitched to a gorilla, you really can't expect a couple with better fortune (and taste) and do you a favor - and if the trade is mutual, what do you get? It's not like you can swap a withered wife or gruesome groom for anything useful, like tickets to Phantom, and what's the real thrill in "trading" one snorting, smelly disappointment for another? Granted, some prefer Gruyere to Neufchatel, but it's all curdled.